Hear that crackling? That’s the sound of yeserday burning in my firepit. I completely lost my mind yesterday and I’m destroying all the evidence.
I don’t know what happened. I woke up nice. Had my quiet time nice. Committed the day to touching at least one person, nice, and got ready for work. Everything went well until about 9:01 when I got a phone call from an out of control person and it went downhill pretty fast from there. I internalized their anger instead of praying it off me. Several episodes later, I finally shut off my phone, told everyone I had an appointment and headed home for some Road Therapy.
I traded my heels for cowboy boots and my suitcoat for a leather vest. I hopped on my iron pony and hit the road. I needed to find and follow some essence of Jesus because surely to goodness that was not the aroma that was blowing off of me.ÂÂ
In search of myself with the wind in my face, at about M-24 and Dryden Rd, I came upon a mother duck leading 11 babies across the highway. I hate seeing stuff like this. On a 1-10 emotion scale, I’m a 12 and this stuff haunts my vision for weeks.
Thank goodness traffic was pretty light and I was grateful that the car in front of me slowed down and carefully went around them. I managed to maneuver around the fuzzy passel as well and without my Python pipes blowing them into the other lane. I hit the gas and started to run through the gears again, on my way to find the sweet smell of Jesus but I kept looking at them in my mirrors. Those cute fuzzy little things…what was she thinking anyway?
There were more cars coming and she appeared to have stopped right in the middle of the lane. I took a quick glance around and made my decision. U-Turn. I rode back to the fuzzy little group standing stock-still right in the middle of the road. I stopped just behind them in the opposite lane and gently revved the engine into a healthy little roar. Off they went in a running wobble to the safety of the pond across the street.
Ha! Easy as that and took me about 90 seconds. The essence of Jesus, I could smell it again. Grace, concern, action. A simple hand-up in a time of need. I don’t have to save someone’s life to wear the essence of Jesus, maybe I just have to do my part in the moment, no matter how insignificant and ill-equipped I feel. I love road therapy.
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April 27, 2007 at 10:47 am
Pingback from trying to listen · We Move Forward with Hope
April 25, 2007 at 9:51 am
billclark
G.
This is an interesting tension that I’m not sure I’m ever going to fully understand. Practice is important (”train unto godliness”), performance is important (otherwise what’s all this talk from Paul about running races?) but transformation is what its all about (too many versus to mention) - but what’s cause? what’s effect? what’s the means? what’s the end?
Sometimes it seems like a gestalt test - the more you look at it, the more the images flip back and forth!
April 25, 2007 at 11:22 am
obahsomah
bill clark you are always thinking!
I think the performing part is to perform before one and only one…God. When we set out to proclaim and perform our deeds as something WE are doing, not something God is doing through us, then it is showing off.
Gwen…always getting me thinking way to early! Love you!
April 25, 2007 at 12:01 pm
awarriorprincess
maybe its where the energy is coming from to begin with? maybe when we expect nothing in return? Maybe when we project the shekina shine away from ourselves? maybe when we walk away without having flown our banner at all and make people want to ask “why”?
April 25, 2007 at 1:43 pm
parke
In some unhealthy situations there really is a sense of performance. I think that it’s worthwhile noting that sometimes we mistake things for performance that are healthy. For example, non-profits frequently tout what they are doing. There is a wrong way to do this, but they know that by touting what is being done (via the power of the supporters and with the energy of the receivers) encourages even more people to jump in. And there is a certain amount of that which you’ll see Paul doing in his letters. He praises what some people over here are doing in a letter that will go around so that others will be jealous to do good things.
There’s also an element of praising God. One of my roles in life is to praise God in my writing. Part of that is pointing out miraculous moments that are clearly all God. I think another part of that though is pointing out God at work in the community around me and in the lives of those serving.
It certainly does make for a complex situation to dive into.
April 27, 2007 at 9:11 am
Gwen
True Parke, I think when there is performance but it’s not for self, that there is a bigger picture for the good of others, that’s transformance.
When I think of Performance I think ritualistic and empty, just going through the motions because we were taught that Christians live a certain way or perform kind deeds. There doesn’t appear to be any life behind it.
April 27, 2007 at 10:19 am
parke
That’s fair.
April 27, 2007 at 10:23 am
Gwen
but sad…